im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
