I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Randomize
