Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
Woke up with a retainer in my boxers and about ten chicks passed out around me. now I feel like something out of Cinderella, trying to find whose teeth fit in the glass retainer.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
We talked him into tasing himself.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
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