Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
