its not stalking. its research.
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
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