Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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