When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize
