He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
Randomize
