I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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