You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize
