i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
