Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
this is an emotional support booty call
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
Randomize
