I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
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