I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
Randomize
