This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
Randomize
