Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Randomize
