He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
Randomize
