Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
