how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
Randomize
