Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize
