so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
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