Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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