im gay
i know
yea but for you.
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Randomize
