Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
Randomize
