if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
third nipple confirmed
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
