shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
Randomize
