I murdered the dance floor call the cops
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
Randomize
