can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Randomize
