i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
Randomize
