Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
