Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize
