hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
Randomize
