you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Randomize