My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
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