considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
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