K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
