CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize
