erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
Randomize
