woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
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