can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
