how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
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