If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
Randomize
