No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
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