his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
