have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
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