I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
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