Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Can you please stop fucking every bartender in the city? Just once I want to have a Jack and Coke without fielding questions about your availability.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Randomize
