Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
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