Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize
