So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Randomize
